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Guest: Abby Lokits @wearefreetomove
Show Notes:
Abby Lokits is the sister-in-law of Alyssa Lokits, a beloved advocate whose unwavering love for others, intellectual curiosity, and commitment to progress left a lasting impact. Tragically, her life was taken in a senseless act of violence while she was simply out for a run, a place where she felt safe and free.
During this episode, sponsored by Amazfit, we talk about:
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Where she currently lives in beautiful Colorado and growing up in Missouri
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What it really means to be a librarian
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Getting into running for her mental health after having her first kid young
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Family adventures in Colorado with three kids - including a family 14er
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Meeting the Lokits family, Alyssa’s family
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Losing Alyssa
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Who Alyssa was - a runner, a PHD, a world traveler…someone who showed up for everyone
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Free to Move, the organization started in Alyssa’s honor
Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] This is a Sandy Boy Productions podcast.
Ally Brettnacher: Welcome to Finish Lines and Milestones, a podcast for everyday runners. I'm your host, Ally Brettnacher, and if you run, you're a runner and every runner has a story. Join me each week as I share these stories and we celebrate finish lines and milestones together.
This episode of the podcast is brought to you by Amazfit Amazfit is a global, smart wearable brand that designs smart watches. Fitness trackers and health technology for active lifestyles. If you haven't heard of Amazfit like I hadn't before this partnership, they've been around since 2015. I have the balance to watch. It has replaced my Apple watch, which is kind of crazy. I never thought that I would wear my running watch 24 7, but I do now and the battery life is 21 days, so I don't have to worry. If it's charged like I did with the model of Garmin that I had previously, I [00:01:00] do still use my Garmin only for when I'm doing customized workouts for my coach because she uses an app called vdot and I was excited to learn last year that a maze fit is in talks to integrate with vdot.
So this watch again, battery life is amazing. It has all the features and functionality you would expect from a watch like this, and the price point is really competitive. the, the balance two is 2 99, as an example. They have a model above it.
They have models below it. So anything that you need, you can find. At a Amazfit So go to amazfit.com. You can use code ALLYB for 10% off your order. And right now through January 19th, they still have their New Year sale happening, so you can save up to 45%. So already good prices. Even better.
So if you or someone you know is looking for a new smartwatch this year, check out Amazfit am maze fit.com. Thank you Amazfit for supporting this podcast. And now for this week's episode, I had the opportunity to interview Abby Lokits sister-in-law of Alyssa Lokits.
You may know that [00:02:00] name from hearing it in the news. Sadly, Alyssa was killed while on a run October 14th, 2024. And if you're like me, stuff like that makes you really mad. I. Obviously believe women should be able to run whenever, wherever they want and feel safe, and so this is a cause that free to move is supporting and that you can support by supporting free to move.
But even just today, I was scrolling and saw a story from Greenwood, Indiana, not that far from where I live, where a woman was running and it was dark, but she had a flashing vest. She was running in her neighborhood and a truck pulled over, turned off his engine, and a man chased her.
And thankfully, neighbors heard, but I, I couldn't believe that. I just saw that story today and that it hits so close to home. And certainly Alyssa's story does as well.
And I just wanna say to anybody from the Lokits family who is listening, actually, I don't know what to say, but that. I am here to support this cause and I think it's a really important one.
And so I got to meet Abby and get to know her and [00:03:00] her personal running journey, how she met her husband, Sean Lokits, and a little bit about their family life as well. And then of course, heard a little bit more about Alyssa and who she was. And I think you're gonna be really fired up by this conversation with Abby Lokits
Abby Lokits, welcome. How are you?
Abby Lotkis: I'm doing well. Thank you. How are you?
Ally Brettnacher: Good. Thank you so much for doing this.
Abby Lotkis: Yeah, absolutely.
Ally Brettnacher: Okay, so tell people where you're sitting right now. Where are you from?
Abby Lotkis: Um, so I live in a little mountain town just outside Boulder, Colorado called Neland. we are the town of Eldora Ski Resort if people from Colorado know where that's at, I'm sure most people Coloradoans do, but we just recently moved to the mountains actually this summer. Uh, we lived in Denver for almost a decade, before moving out of the city.
And yeah, we are loving our little at a little mountain town. It's, our house is in a little aspen grove and it like has a little creek running through it. It's like a dream. So
Ally Brettnacher: gosh. It sounds like it. it sounds like you might have land versus living in [00:04:00] suburbia neighborhood type of
Abby Lotkis: Mm-hmm. Yep. Yep. So, yeah, we lived like, in the city, in the city for many, many years, and, , my husband and I both realized that just wasn't our thing. , So we made the effort to, to get out and, yeah. No regrets. It's, it's amazing.
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah, I mean, you can tell by the notes I sent you that I went through your Instagram and I'm just like, looking at these, which I was like, well, super creepy ally, but you know, how else do you get to try to know somebody before? Um, but I just was like, oh my gosh. I mean, not only is it just absolutely beautiful out there.
You've got three little kids that you're, doing so much really cool stuff with, like outdoorsy. So I wanna talk about some of that and how the heck you do it. But I feel like, you know, families that live out west, that's just what you do.
Abby Lotkis: Yeah.
Ally Brettnacher: it's, it's really cool. So you're not originally from Colorado though?
Where are you from
Abby Lotkis: Um, no, I grew up in Missouri, , and that is actually where I met my husband in college, in a small college town in Missouri. And [00:05:00] then just right after we got married, he was offered a position out in Golden Colorado. And so we made the move. Yeah.
Ally Brettnacher: Wow. And we've never looked back.
yeah, I mean, why would you, is Missouri considered the Midwest?
Abby Lotkis: Yes. Yeah. Mm-hmm.
Ally Brettnacher: so. I was like, are you? Yeah. 'cause it's right next to, okay, got it. Illinois. So you're also from the Midwest. I feel like about half of the people who listen to this are local to Indianapolis area where I'm from, but then there's people all over.
So fellow, mid-westerner. how did you meet your husband in college? Were you in the same like classes? Did you meet at like a party? How did you first meet?
Abby Lotkis: So we were neighbors. He lived across the street from me. Um, yeah.
riverside_flams_- abby lotkis _ jan 08, 2026 001_finish_lines & mile: Um,
Abby Lotkis: Um. we were just, you know, acquaintances, friends for a while. , And then he, at one point, one summer brought over some tomato plants and asked if I wanted to plant them with him and make some like upside down tomato plant planters.
And I didn't realize that was his way of, weaseling in. Um, yeah. And so then one thing led [00:06:00] to another and we are married actually 10 years this aug, this last August was our 10 year anniversary,
Ally Brettnacher: Oh wow. Congratulations. That's a huge milestone.
Yeah. Yeah. And so what did you study in school? Because you ended up a librarian. Did you know that's what you wanted to be?
Abby Lotkis: I, not really, I, right in the, the beginning of college I got a job, in a library. And, worked there for several months, really liked it. Um, but actually thought I was gonna go into the medical field and then life happened, this and that. Um, ended up my degree is in psychology. didn't get my master's in librarianship, but was able to work my way up into a librarian position out here in Colorado.
and so for, gosh, it was probably the better part of a decade that I was, working in libraries. Boulder Public Library System, Jefferson County Library System in Colorado. and then actually right before we lost Alyssa, I had decided I wanted to try something different, make a career change. Believe it or not, [00:07:00] librarianship is not just sitting and reading books all day.
Um, as many people think. it's a lot, especially public. Librarianship is very. Emotionally taxing work, the really, really hard work, in the communities. So, I did, I was a school librarian for several years before I decided to make the switch, outside of librarianship. so
Ally Brettnacher: Okay. What do you mean by emotion? Like the emotionally taxing part? Like I know it's, it's very strategic to like get the right books in and do things like that, but what parts of that job do people maybe just not understand? Myself included?
Abby Lotkis: so public libraries specifically have really evolved into much more comprehensive, like, community centers for people from all backgrounds and all populations, right? But, um, a lot of individuals use them as kind of a safe haven, because we welcome everyone, which is one of the things I love about, I loved about being a librarian was.
The inclusivity piece of, of really just never, ever [00:08:00] turning anyone away, to be able to serve them in the best capacity that you can. But it just is a lot. There was a lot of, you know, individuals experiencing homelessness. There was a lot of, just sad situations with really high needs families who needed more than we were able to give as a library.
Um, and so that just was a lot. And with having small kiddos, the long hours and all of that, it was, um, a switch to the school library was, a good fit for us at the time. And then after a few years, I decided to move out of that as well.
Ally Brettnacher: Mm-hmm.
Yeah. so on the running side of things, since of course this is a running podcast, are, were you like, growing up? Athletic as a kid. I mean, obviously you're very outdoorsy now, but tell people about how you found the sport of running and also triathlons. I saw.
Abby Lotkis: Yeah, so I actually was not, I was probably, I, I never ran as a child. I was not athletic. I wouldn't have called myself athletic. I was a bookworm. I did like, you know, I would get in [00:09:00] trouble for reading too much at home because that was, you know, what, what I did. but then in college I really fell in love with running as, a benefit to my mental health.
I really found that it was really, really helpful for me. I had kids very young and needed an outlet For just myself, a way to care for myself, and that's where I fell in love with it. I was never, never fast, never, you know, really competitive, but just loved to be outside and to move my body and I knew how good it was for my, my spirit and my soul and my brain.
So yeah, that's how I fell in love with it. So I've been running for over a decade now. actually not currently. I'm injured, but, excited to get back into it.
Yeah. Um, it has been such a lifesaver through for me through so many seasons of life, and I've found so many wonderful people.
I've connected with so many amazing people who just really relate to that, and that's where we, you know, also comes in, like all of our lifestyle, outdoorsy, active stuff is just knowing how good it is [00:10:00] for, you know, to be outside and to be active in nature.
Ally Brettnacher: Yes. Yes, absolutely. And during college, like when you were running, did you do any races, even just for fun or at what point do you remember like when you signed up for your very first race?
Abby Lotkis: Um, I did not, I did not do, I think my first race was a sprint triathlon.
Ally Brettnacher: Okay.
Abby Lotkis: I didn't start racing until, um, I, until we moved to Colorado and that's when we were really immersed and like the really active, active, communities out here. Um, so I was inspired to sign up for my first half marathon, I think.
And then I, but I think first I did, I think I did a triathlon first and then a half marathon maybe. I can't remember. but I also would like just. Run for myself mostly. so like I would, you know, set a goal of I'm gonna run, like, one time I ran 14 miles from one side of Denver to the other side of Denver, just for fun.
Like, I was like, I'm gonna do this, I wanna reach this [00:11:00] milestone and then take the train from East Denver back to West Denver and like it, like things like that. I would just enjoy, like very personal. It's always been very, very personal to me. you know, very personal goal setting. I've never been really competitive with anybody but myself.
just because I just enjoy doing it. So like, I'll go and I'll say, you know, I'm gonna go run up this mountain and I'm gonna, you know, for me and then not tell anybody about it. I'm like, I'm gonna do that.
Ally Brettnacher: And then you'd go home and you'd be like, yeah, I just ran, you know, just ran up a mountain.
Abby Lotkis: Yeah, exactly.
Ally Brettnacher: wow. 14 miles from one side of Denver to the next, like, how could you, are there just, is there a trail or trail system all
Abby Lotkis: I did. Yeah. It was like, I don't know how, what you guys call them, but in Nashville they call 'em greenways. So it was essentially just different like, paths, like paved paths that I would take. So yeah. Yeah,
Ally Brettnacher: Wow. Okay. And so can we talk about you becoming a mom at a young age? You were a teen mom.
Abby Lotkis: Yes. Yeah. Mm-hmm.
Ally Brettnacher: That is crazy. At what [00:12:00] age did you have your oldest?
Abby Lotkis: Um, I was, a month shy of my 19th birthday when I had him. Yeah.
Ally Brettnacher: Okay. So was that while you were in college then?
Abby Lotkis: Yes. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. So
so, yeah.
Ally Brettnacher: in the world did you navigate that?
Abby Lotkis: at the time it was, I mean, it was a lot. Um,
Ally Brettnacher: mean, I, I mean, I can't, I can't imagine. Yeah.
Abby Lotkis: think that it was kind of my first experience with what true resilience is. I lived a very, very blessed life. very, very privileged life. and becoming pregnant so young was the first time I really had to pull myself up by the bootstraps.
and it really gave me a taste of what it meant to truly persevere and to truly have to dig deep for resilience. I went back to school two weeks after he was born.
Ally Brettnacher: Two weeks.
Abby Lotkis: yeah, to finish out the semester, because I didn't want to fall behind because I knew the [00:13:00] statistics for teen moms graduating college at the time, especially, were pretty
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah.
Abby Lotkis: and I had an amazing amount of support too, which helped beyond, you know, I could ever say.
But yeah, it was definitely my first experience of really, you know, seeing life, you know, beyond the roses and the, the rainbows. And he's wonderful. He's almost 14 now. and he's a wonderful, awesome kid. but yeah, it was hard for a long time and my husband and I actually, I.
we met, we were neighbors and Liam, my son, was living with, me and so he knew right away obviously that it was gonna be a package deal
whenever we started dating.
So,
Ally Brettnacher: That's really special too,
Abby Lotkis: Yeah.
Ally Brettnacher: so was moving to Colorado, like easy, was it a difficult thing to be, to pick up Liam and move to Colorado or.
Abby Lotkis: Um, I think that it was just another one of those experiences of like
just bucking up and doing the hard thing and finding that resilience and [00:14:00] knowing that a choice is the right choice. And even though it's hard and it was, it was very hard because I had grown up and lived in the same place.
I don't know if it's like this in Indiana, but you like. Grow up in the small town, and then you usually come back and stay in that small town and people usually don't leave where they grow up or they, you know, only go a couple hours away. And this was, a really big move. And so it was just more of that digging deep for resilience and persevering through the hard things and thinking of it as an adventure and as an exciting thing.
and it was probably one of the best decisions we could have ever made, you know, as a young family at the time.
Yeah.
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah. Well, and so did your parents still live nearby where you went to college then?
Abby Lotkis: yeah. So I,
Ally Brettnacher: close.
Abby Lotkis: yeah, so we lived in like a little, I mean, the house that my son and I lived in was like probably the size of my bedroom now at this point. Like it was teeny, teeny little, like one bedroom.
riverside_flams_- abby lotkis _ jan 08, 2026 001_finish_lines & mile: And,
Abby Lotkis: they lived, you know, five, 10 minutes away in the [00:15:00] same town. And that's where I went to college too, was in my hometown.
Ally Brettnacher: That's, I mean, that had to be so helpful. Did they take Liam, like when you would go to class, you could just drop him off and,
Abby Lotkis: no, um, they, they were very helpful, but, you know, I had to pay for daycare and, and I had to, you know, like those were the things, so, yeah.
Ally Brettnacher: Damn.
Abby Lotkis: Yeah.
Ally Brettnacher: Geez, Abby.
Abby Lotkis: I don't ever talk about that season of my life.
Ally Brettnacher: I mean, it's like a whole nother life. Like when I, again, like I was going through Instagram, I'm like, wait. You were a teen mom, and I mean, that's just, and to be, yeah, it's just really incredible. I mean, it's no wonder you, yeah, it's just, it's really amazing and inspiring.
Certainly. So, so you guys, how long were you dating until you got married? When did, so I guess it was 10 years ago now, but
Abby Lotkis: So when we first met, I mean, he knew I had a baby, or I guess he wasn't a baby, he was like a toddler at that point, like two and a half or three.
And I just kind of laid it out for him and said, here's the deal. [00:16:00] I know that we're only 21, but I already have a baby. I'm not wanting to mess around. I'm not wanting to date in a way, you know, casually or anything like that. You know, the person I I'm gonna date is gonna be the person I marry, essentially.
just because I, I never wanted my son to have, you know, any, you know, unstable. instability, that's the word, right? Um, and he was like, yes. You know, and it was super fast. I mean, I think that we were married within just over a year after we met or not met, like we had known each other, you know?
But like after we started
Ally Brettnacher: After the tomato, after you had the
Abby Lotkis: Yes, yes.
Ally Brettnacher: upside down, plants.
Abby Lotkis: Yeah. Um, and then, you know, I had also said, like, in that, you know, those initial conversations, you know, I, I don't want there to be a large age gap between my son and future children. Basically. I wanna just get 'em all out of the way right now, you know, I, I'm already in this full [00:17:00] time.
my son's dad, he's in the picture, but it all, it never was a full, and it never was a full like, co-parenting situation.
Ally Brettnacher: Mm-hmm.
Abby Lotkis: so anyway, yeah, we ended up having our. second, very quickly after that, and then three years later had our third, and now we're 32. And like looking at e like starting our empty nester phase in four years, which is like crazy.
Ally Brettnacher: insane.
Abby Lotkis: I've had like this existential crisis over the last, I don't know, six or eight weeks. Like, oh my gosh, we're gonna be 36 years old and have one leaving the nest, which is wild.
Ally Brettnacher: yeah,
yeah.
Abby Lotkis: but yeah, that was just kind of, it was non-traditional, but I knew very quickly that he was the person I wanted to spend my life with.
I mean, it was like within probably a month of us, a a month of the tomato plants, he was, um, I was like, I think that he's the one, and to this day he's like, he's my best friend. You know? I mean, [00:18:00] just. Through it all. So, and he comes from the most incredible family too. I mean, and we'll get on talking about
them shortly, but
I mean, just the most wonderful humans.
so it was just the best package I could have ever asked for. And Liam too, so
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah.
And so do you have siblings? Are you are.
Abby Lotkis: yeah. So I have an older sister and a younger brother. Mm-hmm.
Ally Brettnacher: Okay. Okay. So two girls, boy, and then, so you had two boys and then a girl, right? Is that right? Did you find out what you were having
when you had, yeah. Okay. I don't know how people don't,
Abby Lotkis: I don't either. I was like, I have to know, especially having two boys. And I actually, to be honest, I was not overly thrilled when I found out we were having a girl, like the number three. I was like, oh no, what are we gonna do? I knew how. Difficult. I was as a teenager and I knew just the road as women can be hard.
Ally Brettnacher: mm-hmm.
Abby Lotkis: but now at this point, I mean she's [00:19:00] just, you have daughters, right? I mean,
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah, I have two girls, so yeah, I feel that too. I, if I, yeah, if I had a boy, like my family is all girls, so it's, I would've not known what to do almost, but, but yeah. Yeah.
Abby Lotkis: So, yeah. Yep. They're the perfect grouping of kids. They're super close, which is great too. So yeah.
Ally Brettnacher: And you guys do, I just, I mentioned at the beginning of this, you guys do all kinds of stuff. Like I saw that you did a family fourteener.
Like how, how,
riverside_flams_- abby lotkis _ jan 08, 2026 001_finish_lines & mile: that's
Ally Brettnacher: it. That's the question.
Abby Lotkis: A lot of candy was involved. We do a lot of candy stops. I'm trying to think of what else we did at the time. Our middle child, John, is like just next level when it comes to physical activity outdoors. So we knew he was only five at the time, but we knew he'd be able to hike the whole thing himself.
And so I think that was also helpful was like he's, he is talk about resilient. He is super hearty. kids started snowboarding at [00:20:00] like two years old. I mean he's like, anyway, so we only had to carry one, which I think was helpful, which was our daughter. and then took lots of breaks. We were like, we planned out the, the fourteener because it was shorter.
It was, you know, gonna be less time. We like timed it all really perfectly. I think we may have camped the night before. the big thing is like trying to make it as exciting and as fun and as adventurous as possible. With anything you do with at least my kids, I'm like, we just have to ramp up the excitement.
I think we sang for probably like three hours, you know, like along the trail, like whatever it takes to get to the goal. but yeah, we, uh, summited it. We haven't done another one them since then, unfortunately. But I think we're overdue 'cause I'm sure they could do another one, but
Ally Brettnacher: yeah.
It's just, I've never done one.
I mean, I have, I don't get out west much anymore. We used to, I used to go out and ski. I learned to ski at Steamboat Springs, Colorado. I was born in [00:21:00] Aurora. I can't remember if I told you that the first time we met.
Abby Lotkis: I forgot about that.
Ally Brettnacher: So I've got a little bit of Western in me, but not, not enough, certainly.
So, and then your husband's name is Sean. And so Sean, while you're, you signed up for a triathlon when you moved to Colorado, like is Sean, did he, was he right there with you? Were you guys in that together?
Abby Lotkis: Yep. Yep. He, um, he's also done, he's done different Triathlons, running races, those kinds of things. He actually, at the end of this summer, right when we moved here, tore his ACL and his meniscus on a hike with playing with the kids.
And so, yeah. Um, he had to get like full reconstructive surgery and is out from doing any winter sports, any running really until probably next year, which is, was a really big bummer.
Yeah.
But yes, normally he is right there alongside us. I mean, he's full of adventure, which is awesome. And one of the things that I love about
Ally Brettnacher: Mm-hmm.
Abby Lotkis: Yeah.
Ally Brettnacher: Oh, I feel like you can't live, you can't live in [00:22:00] Colorado without being just like always up for adventure, I feel like. yeah. So you're now like the adventure leader until he's back in the
Abby Lotkis: I know. And the boy, our boys are faster than me on snowboards at this point. And my daughter is almost faster than me. And so I'm like, I'm trying to keep up now, which is, uh, funny 'cause I was, you know, what, 39 weeks pregnant with our daughter, like teaching our son how to snowboard. that's just wild how the tables turn, you know?
But that's your goal. You always want your kids to be better than, than you
Ally Brettnacher: Totally. And so check that box. Yeah. Yeah. So, okay, so you have an older, you said sister and younger brother,
Abby Lotkis: Yes.
Ally Brettnacher: and then Sean comes from a huge family, which I had no idea how big the Lokits family is like. So tell people a little bit about his family, how you first got introduced to his family.
'cause I'm sure that had to be kind of crazy given the size, but Sounds like it was amazing.
Abby Lotkis: [00:23:00] Yes. Yeah, we, I always, I joked in the beginning that they were like the Von Trap family from Sound of Music. '
Ally Brettnacher: I just
Abby Lotkis: all,
Ally Brettnacher: kids. Yeah.
Abby Lotkis: they're all just so wonderful and just so put together and accomplished and, real go-getters like, I mean, just incredible. All, all nine of them, there's nine. So, Sean, my husband is number five.
He's right smack dab in the middle. Um, there's six boys and three girls and I met them, I went, we went up to Virginia for Thanksgiving when Sean and I were dating and I met the whole family. and actually Alyssa was the first person I met from his family. We picked her up along the way and, she was delightful and.
So personable and immediately I was like, okay, I think I'm gonna be all right with this family. They're, they're awesome. and it was, I mean, it's chaos as you can imagine, but it's so awesome because it's just like a party every time we're together and there's always like a core memory made.
Every time we're all [00:24:00] together they're, because it's just silly and fun and, games and late nights and, they're just fantastic.
Yep.
Ally Brettnacher: Nine. Like, it's hard to imagine, like even for me, like you have two kids, you have three kids, three to me, I'm like, okay. And like four or five starts to be unimaginable, and then nine you're just like, okay. I don't know if I've, if I know personally know any families that are that big. Yeah. It's amazing.
Yeah.
Abby Lotkis: when we were first dating, and he told me, he was like, yeah, I have eight siblings. I was like, what? I was like, that's like, are you kidding? Are you joking? No,
it
Ally Brettnacher: yeah. And they're all biological, right? Like I have met people who have had like, have big families 'cause of adoption, right? So that, you know, but then biological, you think, oh my gosh, like his mom.
Abby Lotkis: I know. And she's wonderful. She's, his parents are great. Yeah.
Ally Brettnacher: So where, where is he from?
Abby Lotkis: So he, his family moved around quite a bit. He grew up in the Nashville area for the most [00:25:00] part. And then, I think they, they were in Cincinnati maybe for a little while. Just a little while. And then, Kansas City through high school for him, and that's how he ended up in a school in Missouri for college.
And then his parents moved to Virginia after that. up in the Blue Ridge Mountains. And that's where they, you know, finally settled down. So, everybody's all kind of scattered throughout the south, the southeast, so like North Carolina, Kentucky, Nashville, all around in that area, in Virginia. And then we're the farthest away in Colorado.
Ally Brettnacher: Okay, man, that's a lot of move. That's a lot of moving
for that family. Can you imagine that?
Abby Lotkis: Mm-hmm.
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah. so you got to, you met Alyssa first. That's great. And she was your buffer that had to be so nice to kind of get eased in. so that Thanksgiving you meet everybody. so from there, did you just see the family on holidays? Did you become kind of friends separately with his siblings? Do you know what I'm
getting [00:26:00] at?
Abby Lotkis: Yeah. so actually following the Thanksgiving, I was invited to go to, Rebecca is the middle sister,
Ally Brettnacher: I'm never gonna remember all
Abby Lotkis: I know it's
Ally Brettnacher: I'm gonna just be like, try, yeah.
Abby Lotkis: Um, so middle sister of the three was having her 21st birthday in Nashville, and they invited, the girls all invited me to come, even though, you know, I wasn't married yet into the family, but everybody had, you know, they were like, yeah, they're gonna be getting married.
so it was funny because, Sean at the time, he was like, you need to really, you know, keep it, keep it locked in. Like, you know, be really, you know, on your best behavior. For better, for worse.
Ally Brettnacher: Don't, they better not be taking care of you.
Abby Lotkis: Yes, exactly. I didn't, I know like, how to say that. And I was like, yeah, absolutely. Of course, you know, this is my first time spending with these ladies. and all of the Lokits women are very close, but of course I didn't know that at the time. I just was, you know, going to hang out for the weekend and, went and had one of the best weekends [00:27:00] probably of my adult life and we just danced the night away.
And I, I think that was when I really realized how special his family was, but specifically the women in his family. just really, really special women. So, yeah, we all have been super close ever since. I haven't, because we live so far away. I haven't always been able to make it to the girls weekends, but the, we would do girls weekends almost every summer, and we would do, you know.
Gifts at Christmas, like matching things and stuff like that. And, um, they really just became like sisters to me. and there's, there's seven of us, seven lockets women, I think. including all the sister-in-laws and everything. And they're just the best. Like, I think, like, they're like my sisters. I mean, we call each other sisters 'cause they're just, they're so awesome.
Yeah.
Ally Brettnacher: Which is such, I mean, yeah. What a special and unique.
Situation really.
I mean, to have a family that big and then to be welcome into a family and fit so well in the family,
Abby Lotkis: I like to think so. I [00:28:00] mean, I think so
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah.
Abby Lotkis: they've always
Ally Brettnacher: And they're all here like, Hmm.
Abby Lotkis: yeah, they've always said, if, if anything happens, you know, we're just gonna take you in and we'll leave Sean at the curb. That's what they always say. Yeah. But yeah, like, I mean they, they just, They're just so easy. Yeah. The girls are so,
Ally Brettnacher: And did running ever play a part in your relationship with these women? Like did you ever do races or anything together?
Abby Lotkis: Alyssa specifically, we really bonded over fitness and wellness and our passion for that. that was really just like a thing that she and I both really loved. We, she came out and we did yoga on the rocks at Red Rocks, and we trained for a marathon together. like obviously remotely but together, and I got sick and wasn't able to run it.
But, um, every time we were together, you know, going for a run up at her parents' house, my in-law's house, yeah, that, that was, I would say we bonded over a lot, but specifically just our passion for just living healthy [00:29:00] and enjoying the outdoors. And, when she would come to visit, you know, we would hike or Yeah, yoga or
Ally Brettnacher: Mm-hmm.
Mm-hmm
Abby Lotkis: and the other girls too, like they all enjoy walking and hiking. And actually, you know, two of my sister-in-laws just did the every woman's marathon a couple a
Ally Brettnacher: I, yeah, that looked, that race looks amazing.
Abby Lotkis: yeah. It's,
yeah.
riverside_flams_- abby lotkis _ jan 08, 2026 001_finish_lines & mile: yeah.
Abby Lotkis: but yeah, so that was really where we bonded
Ally Brettnacher: And so what marathon did you train for and did you, have you ever done a marathon
Abby Lotkis: um,
Ally Brettnacher: or did you just not be able to do that one? Okay.
riverside_flams_- abby lotkis _ jan 08, 2026 001_finish_lines & mile: Okay.
Abby Lotkis: so I trained, we trained for the Colorado Marathon, which is the beginning of May. Um, and then I wasn't able to do it. We were like right at the peak of training and I got super, super sick. Um, but she of course was like amazing and supportive as she always was. Um, and then my first marathon was actually a month after Alyssa was killed.
We got the opportunity to, yeah, we got the opportunity to run.
Ally Brettnacher: Mm-hmm.
mm-hmm.
Abby Lotkis: Every, the, the inaugural, every woman's marathon, on behalf in honor of Alyssa.
[00:30:00] And so three of us ran it completely untrained.
Ally Brettnacher: That's right. I now remember you telling me
Abby Lotkis: Yeah. And which is probably a year later why my foot is still not, not,
not good.
I wouldn't suggest, I would not suggest running a marathon.
Untrained, it's,
Ally Brettnacher: But how could you, yeah. I mean, in that case, yeah. You're like, absolutely. I'm doing this.
Abby Lotkis: Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yep. So, so, yeah. my hope is to be able to do another one, hopefully in the next year. but we'll
Ally Brettnacher: Have they announced where the third, every women's marathon's gonna be?
Are they, are they moving it around every year or are they,
Abby Lotkis: I don't know if there're I thought I had heard it was gonna be in Scottsdale again, but I'm not sure.
Yeah.
Ally Brettnacher: Okay. That'd be a
good spot for it
Abby Lotkis: this past year. Yeah. It was gorgeous.
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah. So it's hard to believe that it's, I, I don't wanna say only because I don't know how it feels for you, but a year and a couple months since Alyssa was killed, and for people who don't know the story, they can go read more about it. but she did everything [00:31:00] right.
So
I don't know how much you feel comfortable sharing or wanna talk about, but I would love to. Use this opportunity to learn more about what you're doing in her honor
Abby Lotkis: Mm-hmm.
Ally Brettnacher: so that people can help support you and get involved and continue to fight this fight for, for women.
Abby Lotkis: Mm-hmm. Yes. so yeah, she did everything right. I think that that is the best place to start, which from those who loved her and even those who didn't know her, I think that's. One of the most devastating and shocking things. The, the most senseless thing, the thing that's hardest to wrap your mind around is the thought that any person, any woman can do every single thing.
Right? And it still not be enough to protect themselves.
but I think that that was really kind of one of the driving factors of creating Free to Move was to empower and equip women with these tools. Because 99% of the time they do work. And in Alyssa's case, unfortunately they didn't, but she did everything she was [00:32:00] supposed to be doing and she, she fought and she ran during the day and she ran on a populated trail and all of the things that you're supposed to do. And I think that it's just really important that we. Use what she did and continue to empower and educate women on what's out there so that everybody can just feel and be safer, in the future. I think more awareness surrounding this is essential because as you said before we started the call, like, it sucks to talk about, it really does.
It's awful. It's uncomfortable, it's horrifying to be a loved one who's experienced this kind of loss, but it's so important to talk about because if we don't, then people aren't aware of what's out there and they're not aware of the risks, they're not aware of the tools, and we just really need to increase that awareness.
We need to increase, the priority of this conversation. It was pretty [00:33:00] soon after she passed that her friends and I really felt compelled to do something in her honor. I mean, she was, like I've said in a lot of interviews, and I like say it today too.
I mean, there's no exaggerating. She was one of the strongest women I've ever known in my life. Maybe the strongest, I mean both emotionally, physically, I mean, she was so incredibly strong and she was so remarkable and extraordinary in everything that she, she did and strive to do. And I just really couldn't imagine letting this be the end for her, if that makes sense.
riverside_flams_- abby lotkis _ jan 08, 2026 001_finish_lines & mile: Mm-hmm. That
Abby Lotkis: That just, I think I've said it before in some of my writings, but like. I didn't want her life to be defined by the circumstances of her death, right?
So to allow that kind of power, the person who killed her to have that kind of power just wasn't an option. So all that to say, we really felt compelled to do [00:34:00] something and at first we didn't know what it was and we were tossing around, you know, different ideas of, you know, what do we need to do?
How can we, you know, make the world a better place through her legacy. And, I guess we were doing kind of inadvertent market research, which I didn't realize at the time, but basically talking to dozens and dozens of people, you know, receiving messages from dozens of women who had been assaulted while exercising, reaching out to leaders in the running industry.
I showed up at, do you know TRE?
riverside_flams_- abby lotkis _ jan 08, 2026 001_finish_lines & mile: Mm-hmm. Okay.
Abby Lotkis: So I showed up at TRE last year and essentially. Went booth to booth to all of these major brands and was like, what are you doing about this?
Ally Brettnacher: Wow.
Abby Lotkis: doing? And this was a month after she died. Not
Ally Brettnacher: How did you do? How did you do that,
Abby Lotkis: Yeah, it was awful. But I was like, what?
What are you doing? Basically just like this little, little dark rain cloud going booth to booth. And it was so uncomfortable for people to like be at an event that's so like, you know, energized [00:35:00] and happy. And to have this one random woman come up and just share, share this horrifying story. But that I was like, what do we need to do?
What, what? What's going on here? And so many people, time and time again, were saying it's sensationalized when it happens. It's brought up in the news when it happens, and then nothing is done after that. And as like. Shocking and frustrating as that was, it was so affirming to me of what we needed to do next.
You
know,
Ally Brettnacher: Mm-hmm.
Abby Lotkis: it is unacceptable that this conversation goes away after a horrifying tragedy. Like what we experienced
Ally Brettnacher: Was there anyone that you talked to that was like, they had some kind of good answer. Was there any sort of anyone
Abby Lotkis: No,
Ally Brettnacher: yeah.
Yeah. Sorry. I was
just wondering about that.
Abby Lotkis: like every, like people were saying, yeah, well we did X, Y, Z, but then, you know, that was a campaign that ended and we haven't done anything since, or you [00:36:00] know, so and so did such and such, but that was two or three years ago. And it's like, okay, well what are you doing right now? What is being done right now to address women's safety with these millions and millions of dollars corporations.
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah. Yeah. Wow. Good for you that it took some, I, I can't even imagine, like
Abby Lotkis: And I mean, obviously like it was like I was weepy. I was not as empowered as I was at the time,
Ally Brettnacher: That. That's, I mean, yeah. Yeah.
Abby Lotkis: but I did receive a ton of people who were like, what can we do? What, what should we do? You know, even though they didn't have the answer, they, they saw the pain. I mean, it was so raw. I mean, I was, I think I was maybe not even a week out from running that marathon to, so I was Yeah, physically in pain, emotionally and turmoil.
I mean, it was like, it was a lot, but.
Ally Brettnacher: And you went alone by
yourself.
Abby Lotkis: I was invited to join a panel actually on women's [00:37:00] safety and speak about Alyssa's story. So technically, I guess, I mean, all the women were strangers, wonderful people, but I had never met them. And then, so I spoke at the panel and then yes, I was by myself just wandering the booths.
Ally Brettnacher: How was the panel experience?
Abby Lotkis: Um, it was good. It was pretty, I mean, it, everything was pretty acute back then, like
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah.
Abby Lotkis: So, I mean, I was afraid to even be out at night at that point. Still. I
Ally Brettnacher: Mm-hmm.
Abby Lotkis: I don't think, I mean, maybe people do, but I could never have imagined the secondary personal trauma that was associated with this after losing someone so close.
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah.
Abby Lotkis: I am so thankful that we have grown so much in the last year that the trauma is not as intense, but, yeah, it
Ally Brettnacher: I can't believe you did that so soon after. I mean, it's still really soon after. Really. I mean, in the grand scheme of things, you know, I've talked to people who've [00:38:00] lost loved ones, but it's been years and you know, that doesn't necessarily make it that much easier, but it just feels like, yeah, it hasn't been that long.
gosh, you are so strong, Abby, to go do that. Like how, how do you say yes to that and go do that in honor of her? I mean, it's pretty amazing.
Abby Lotkis: I think that, a big push to try to share her story as much as possible in the beginning, despite like the personal pain and like
Ally Brettnacher: Mm-hmm.
Abby Lotkis: was because I was so afraid that it would get lost and
I, just didn't want it to be lost.
riverside_flams_- abby lotkis _ jan 08, 2026 001_finish_lines & mile: Mm-hmm.
Abby Lotkis: and I think I am feeling at this point a year later, or at least, you know, maybe a few months ago, I was really deeply feeling the grief that I was pushing down, pushing down for so many months, you know, with when it initially happened. but I still think it was worth it because she's just worth it to me.
Ally Brettnacher: Hmm. I wanna talk more about freedom move and what it is. I also wanna make sure we talk a little bit more about Alyssa and who she [00:39:00] was too. I mean, obviously, she shared your love of running in endurance sports, but. She was also super smart PhD. Like holy crap. so I know it's probably hard to wrap into this short amount of time, but if you could give people a little deeper sense of who Alyssa was, I think that that would be really special to be able to,
Abby Lotkis: Yeah. Oh, I love talking about her.
When you first said that, like I saw your list of, Questions. I was like, oh no, not about me. I wanna talk about her. Um, yeah, she was brilliant. I mean, she, she was a PhD graduate from Vanderbilt Neuroscience. she worked in tech as a product manager, for, I believe it was a cybersecurity company, but she also was like, had the most generous heart and was a former board member for the Mary Parish Center, which is, a nonprofit organization that serves victims of interpersonal violence.
So
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah.
Abby Lotkis: she was very much community oriented and community service oriented. She [00:40:00] spoke multiple languages, which was always baffling to me. she was very, very resilient too. I mean. She put her mind to something, it was like, yeah, that's happening. Like, that's it. I mean, there was, there was no stopping her, which was something I admired so much about her.
Ally Brettnacher: mm.
Abby Lotkis: she was really funny too. on top of it all. Yeah, she was just, yeah, she was great. she also just loved the outdoors. I mean, she was a big hiker. She camped, she was extremely independent, so she traveled all over the world by herself, I mean with friends, but also solo traveled. She joined the kids and I, a few years ago, out in Spain for a couple weeks and then stayed while we were out there and just went and explored Spain, you know, after the kids and I left.
And I mean, she just was always about traveling and exploring and learning. I mean, she was a lifelong learner and. Also just a lifelong adventurer. I She was,
Ally Brettnacher: And how, how old was she when she passed?
Abby Lotkis: [00:41:00] 34.
Ally Brettnacher: Three, four?
Abby Lotkis: Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah..
Ally Brettnacher: Mm-hmm.
Abby Lotkis: Mm-hmm Yep. And she was also like, just a badass. I mean, she trained
in crop, she McGaw for, for years. I mean, in self-defense. She was very well trained. Like she could take down any of her six brothers, probably like, and she was, she was little too. I mean, she was shorter than me, but mighty, mighty, mighty.
Ally Brettnacher: And where was she in the birth order?
Abby Lotkis: was the oldest daughter,
Ally Brettnacher: oldest daughter.
Abby Lotkis: right above Sean. So number four.
Ally Brettnacher: Okay.
Okay. Yeah. Oldest daughter.
Abby Lotkis: Mm-hmm.
Ally Brettnacher: That's what I am too.
man, she just sounds so freaking amazing. It's just pisses me off even more. after she passed, did you have time to celebrate her life or do you think about that differently now? Like, do you celebrate her birthday? I mean, ways to kind of keep that spirit [00:42:00] around.
'cause it's gotta be Yeah. So hard.
Abby Lotkis: Yeah, I think it's,
I mean, I, I always want, especially when we're, we're family, I always wanna talk about her and bring her up into the conversation just because she was so effervescent. I mean, one of the ways that, one of the things I love the most about her too was that she always showed up for people.
I mean, she was at every graduation, every birthday, every significant life event for her siblings, for all eight of her siblings. I mean, that's a lot of siblings. And she showed up all the time.
riverside_flams_- abby lotkis _ jan 08, 2026 001_finish_lines & mile: so
Abby Lotkis: I think that that is the way to celebrate her is to just continue showing up. You know, with the family showing up for the nonprofit. It's hard. I think still it's very painful to think of celebrating. I don't know if that's, that's a hard word to wrap around. cause it's just, there's still just so much pain at losing her. but I, you know, I want people to know who she is all the time and how awesome she is. So, yeah.
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah. So how long [00:43:00] after did you officially start free to move and how did that come together?
Abby Lotkis: So I. Had heard that Alyssa wanted to someday start a foundation. She had spoken about it to a friend of hers months and months prior. And I went to this friend of hers, Kayla, and I said, Hey, I heard that you and Alyssa had had a conversation months ago about starting a foundation.
Can you tell me more about this? Because I, I just really feel like we need to do something and I just, it's just tugging on my heart essentially that we need to, to do something. And I wanna know kind of what Alyssa's vision was for this foundation. She wanted, and her vision was a little bit different.
'cause obviously, you know. Who could have imagined, what the next year would hold, but it surrounded women, right? And empowering women, specifically funding women in stem, which she obviously worked in stem, had her education in stem. And so I talked with Kayla and then Alyssa's childhood best friend, [00:44:00] Bethany further about it and said, you know, what, if we, what if we did this foundation thing?
What if we really focused on it being surrounding women, but women's safety and women's resources for safety and exercise and outside? And they were really, really intrigued by it. We started looking into it further, you know, foundation versus nonprofit, kind
of what we wanted to do in terms of our mission as an organization.
And we found that, you know, we really wanted to do more service. I mean, similar to Alyssa, right? We wanted to be able to provide resources and services for the community at large. That's kind of where my big, you know, like librarian lens came in of, how do we create equity of access for this information?
How do we increase intellectual freedom surrounding women's safety? how do we make these resources truly accessible for all women? And that's kind of how Freedom move came to be, was this conglomeration of ideas from Alyssa's friends and family. And then [00:45:00] January 1st, 2025, so almost a year ago, we formally, established the organization and the board is made up of all of Alyssa's, not all of them.
She had so many friends, but many of Alyssa's closest friends. And also one sibling of LA's family. My husband's actually on the board. And um, yeah, it's been just a really incredible way
riverside_flams_- abby lotkis _ jan 08, 2026 001_finish_lines & mile: way to
Abby Lotkis: to funnel grief. And, you know, turn it into something hopeful and something impactful. I think many of us just needed something to funnel that grief in a productive way.
because at, at the beginning, like, I mean, it was just so suffocating. I mean, incapacitating was how bad the grief was. so to be able to take that and create something in her honor, I think honors her. But it also was helpful for us as the loved ones who were just struggling so deeply.
Ally Brettnacher: Mm-hmm.
Abby Lotkis: So,
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah.
[00:46:00] So what is the difference between a nonprofit and a foundation?
Abby Lotkis: so I'm not the one that did all of the
Ally Brettnacher: I should Google, well, I can Google that later. You don't have to be the expert,
riverside_flams_- abby lotkis _ jan 08, 2026 001_finish_lines & mile: so
Abby Lotkis: so foundations, from what I understand, do more like philanthropic giving to individuals and organizations through the form of like
scholarships or, you know, charitable giving. Whereas nonprofits will provide, some sort of service or resource to the community. and we felt really strongly with Alyssa's love of learning, with her passion for helping others, that we wanted to provide resources for women, create our own resources that can be provided free of cost, you know, to everybody.
cause there really isn't, a lot out there, for women's safety that is truly accessible. And a lot of it is for-profit companies that are selling a product, which is great, but that's not, you know, the one size, there's no one size fits all to safety. And I just. I think that we need to help create [00:47:00] awareness surrounding all of the options, surrounding all of the tools, to be truly comprehensive in our approach so that people know what's out there for them.
Because what feels safe to me in Netherland, Colorado is gonna be different than what feels safe to you in Indiana
based on so many factors. So, trying to just create one product or, or sell one app or whatever is, is not gonna be the, you know, it's not gonna fix everything. So,
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah. So, so tell people I guess a little bit more about that and, and perhaps what you're, you're building too, like you mentioned with the greenways in Nashville and how you're partnering with them to do more.
Abby Lotkis: yeah. So as I did this right, like unintentional market research. Going to TRE crying to people in the booths, meeting with dozens of people online, like, via Zoom in person. I realized that it's just so much bigger than one thing that we need to provide and that it really [00:48:00] is a systemic issue that needs to be addressed, from a multifaceted approach. You know, I think that municipalities need to have accountability and ownership over infrastructure improvements in order to create safer environments for women. Just as much as running industry brands should support and promote programs for runner safety or women's safety and exercise, on the educational side.
So it's really very comprehensive and we dialed it into three main safety strategies that we're addressing through education and resource building. And that is the neurophysiological side of safety, which is your, you know, regulating your nervous system, discussing the four F's, fight, flight, freeze, and fawn.
How do we navigate our internal compass in order to be fully regulated when we're out or when something feels unsafe? And then there's the preventative safety strategies, which are, you know, what many of us know about, you know, [00:49:00] situational awareness, running in groups, wearing one headphone out, or using o you know, bone conduct, taking headphones.
how to create more accessibility among apps like Strava and different things so that people know all the safety resources that are already embedded in those apps. Um, among many other things. And then you have your reactive safety strategies. So that would be not just self-defense, I actually really don't like the term self-defense very much.
Because it's so much larger than that. You know, reactive safety strategies also include, you know, boundary setting, using your voice, you know, creating distance. There are so many other options that you have that, you know, are all encompassing in that reactive safety strategy bucket. and I do believe that across those three strategies, we can really systemically approach safety because part of those preventative stra safety strategies are municipality involvement.
So like, like what we're trying to do with, um, the City of Nashville and Greenways for Nashville [00:50:00] with doing a monthly walk audit along greenways is getting community, insights into recommendations, observations for infrastructure improvements. So noticing sight lines, noticing, you know, trail maintenance needs, noticing, lighting, you know.
Improvements that are needed. Those are all preventative strategies that can be addressed by, you know, a municipality. So all that to say, we
want to, we have four main pillars that we're focusing on this next year. So we have research, education, advocacy, and empowerment. research is really, really important to us just because there really isn't a ton of research out there that focuses on specifically women's safety in active spaces.
Plus we just want to be able to have all of our education resources be backed by our research. Secondly, we have our education, component, which is where we're building out our video resource library. So we began that with our foundational series that [00:51:00] briefly touches on those three strategies that I, that I mentioned. Then we'll be going deeper into those three strategies over the next few years. Um, this coming year we're building out the reactive safety strategy video. and then from there we'll be building out the others advocacy, is where this, this audit program that we're wanting to do we'll come in and that, essentially is just bringing the community together and then from there, recording, collecting the data from their observations and building a report and presenting it to, city of Nashville and other key stakeholders.
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah,
Abby Lotkis: And then, sorry, I'm, I'm on my Yap train now.
So,
Ally Brettnacher: This is good.
Abby Lotkis: um, and then finally that empowerment piece, which is pretty easy I think to, to guess. But that is how do we get just more engaged into the community? How do we spread awareness, share Alyssa's story. Share about what we have, but also about all the other organizations that are doing awesome things for women in this space.
I am all about sharing is caring [00:52:00] because it shouldn't just be a one man show, you know, it needs to be everybody coming together. This needs to be a united effort. I don't believe that, you know, one brand should, you know, do all the research and then hold it to the, to be their research and their programming.
I think this needs to be something that across the board, it's accessible for everyone. Right.
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah.
Abby Lotkis: Um, so that's where the empowerment comes in.
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah. Wow. It just makes me think about you walking around at those booths and it's like, now, like even just thinking about it now, I'm like, okay, so like, yeah, what are, what are they doing? Are they, you know, how,
Abby Lotkis: Yep.
Ally Brettnacher: how do you get the, you know, the organizations that have the means to fund these four pillars that you're talking about?
I mean, have you been able to work with any brands yet? Is that something that you're working towards?
Abby Lotkis: Working towards, I actually had a conversation with, someone that works for a running brand, and I said, if you just allow me to come in and speak to your [00:53:00] people, you don't have to support our organization, but support someone in this space. It doesn't have to be Yes, that's fine. It, you know, we, I don't ever want people to think that we're going after the dollar because that is not at all what it is about.
I mean, this is about the mission, and if that
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah.
Abby Lotkis: Seven major running brands decide that they're gonna fund X, y, Z organization towards women's safety and it isn't ours. Fantastic. Please do it. Yes,
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah.
Abby Lotkis: That is what this is about. It's, you know, even if we stay small and just based, you know, in the southeast, that's okay.
As long as every region is getting covered by somebody, everybody is getting the resources from someone. That's what I care about.
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah.
Abby Lotkis: so that was a roundabout way of answering your question,
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah. Well it's, it's just ' I know it's not in about the money, but it's also like, gosh, money can make so much possible for organizations like yours and I know that you, just raise $3,000. I'm giving Tuesday, which is [00:54:00] incredible. But as people start to think about ways they can help support free to move, you know, obviously donations help.
what other ways can people listening support you and free to move?
Abby Lotkis: So spreading awareness is huge. Sharing Alyssa's story sharing about our organization. we do have a get involved component somewhere, I believe on our website.
Ally Brettnacher: Hmm.
riverside_flams_- abby lotkis _ jan 08, 2026 001_finish_lines & mile: Um,
Abby Lotkis: we are free to move.org. Um, you can also reach out to us on our Instagram page at we are free to move. we love volunteers to come in and, you know, share this story with our run clubs.
Our hope is to be able to really start expanding beyond just Tennessee, in the run club scene and visit existing run clubs out across the nation just to share her story and spread awareness. So if you have a run club that you're a part of or a walking club. Or even a running store, you know, and you would like to, you know, share the story.
We can even just send you materials,
Ally Brettnacher: Right. Yeah, that'd be [00:55:00] great.
Abby Lotkis: So, um, yeah, we are just, we're still a baby nonprofit, so we're still, you know, learning the ropes a little bit. But it is so important to me that we just keep sharing about this and we just keep spreading awareness. cause that's what's gonna get, you know, things moving.
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah, yeah. Well, and I, I never wanna assume that you are already connected with, with everybody who's in this space. 'cause even just within running, I'm sure there's, there's a lot of, you know, companies that have products or whatever that might be. Um.
So are you still kind of in that phase where you're building that network where people could help?
Abby Lotkis: Yes, if you have, yeah, and if you have people that you think would be great to get connected with, I love connecting with people and networking and you know, just having conversations about this. I mean, that was what probably the first 3, 4, 5 months of us starting this organization was just conversations, just hearing people's input, people's [00:56:00] stories, meeting with anyone who would be willing to listen to our story too, you know?
cause I think in order to really make a change, you have to be open to everybody's perspective and, really build a community surrounding it. So, I love talking about this, I'm passionate about it and, yeah, always willing to have a conversation.
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah. And you told me when we first met that this is what you do. Like this is your
job now.
Abby Lotkis: Yeah. So. Someday, maybe I'll go back to libraries, but for now this is what we're doing and it feels very right where I'm at right now. and I think that's how we know this is where we need to be and this is the right thing to do is for all of us who are involved in the organization, it just feels so right to be here in this, to be working through with this, you know, in this.
and that's how you know, right?
Ally Brettnacher: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Will you ever have like a race, you think? Something
Abby Lotkis: So, so we did a 5K last [00:57:00] spring in honor of Alyssa. and it was wonderful. We had a huge turnout, like international turnout, which was insane. and it was awesome. This coming year we're taking a little bit of a step back from hosting any public front facing fundraisers. Just because of, Alyssa's trial is coming up in this next year.
So the family and friends and loved ones of Alyssa who are running this organization all just agree that we need to do some self preservation, on that side of things. So our hope is really just to engage a lot this coming year with already existing run clubs, already existing races and events. my sisters and I love to run races, so if anybody has a race that they're like, Hey, you wanna come and be a part of it, like we are all about it.
We love it, we love to dress up, we're our free to move, stuff and just bring good energy to the space. So. Yeah. that's what the next year looks like. I do see another race in our future. we [00:58:00] have really loved working alongside Run Nash, which is a race management company in Nashville.
Um, and I hope to use them again, hopefully in 2027, but we have a little bit of time.
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah. Well, I sit on the board for Indianapolis Marathon, which, you know, we're kind of central like, to get you all together. So I should, I should see if our team, would have you and, and hook you up with like a place to stay and all of that. That would be amazing to
be able to, to, bring you here. you know, it's not like the Honolulu Marathon but our race is, we're now 13th in the country in terms of size, so yeah, it's a really wonderful race.
Abby Lotkis: that's awesome. When, what time of the year is it?
riverside_flams_- abby lotkis _ jan 08, 2026 001_finish_lines & mile: in?
Ally Brettnacher: Um, it is November, usually the first Saturday in November, so I should know that off the top of my head. I'm a terrible board member. Um, we have a meeting tonight, I'm sure it's like, I don't know, it's a six or it's usually around there,
but
Abby Lotkis: Nice. Very cool. Yeah, I mean we, that's like only I think three or four hours from Nashville, so
Ally Brettnacher: exactly. Yeah, I think it's [00:59:00] about four.
Yeah, it's been a while since I've made that drive. I do. Yeah. I've done the half a bunch of times and then I've done the full twice. Um, now with how much work I put into it, usually the half is the better choice for me.
Abby Lotkis: Yes.
riverside_flams_- abby lotkis _ jan 08, 2026 001_finish_lines & mile: Yes.
Ally Brettnacher: but yeah, so, I'm just excited to know you and have the opportunity to support what you're doing in honor of Alyssa.
You know, I'm sure I speak for a lot of women who, and I'm sure you've heard this too, who just see themselves in Alyssa, right. And, and see their friends or their sister. And, and so it hits so incredibly close to home for everybody. And, and you know, oftentimes you just feel so helpless in being able to do anything to support.
And so, you know, having an organization like Free to Move, you know, who's bringing people together and really focusing on the systemic issue, I think is,
is amazing. It's really great to have, have a connection to you and be able to support you moving forward. I just rambled. I don't even know if what I [01:00:00]
Abby Lotkis: No, you're good.
Ally Brettnacher: sense at all.
Abby Lotkis: It's beautiful.
Ally Brettnacher: Uh, but I love you and I'm so glad I know you. Um.
Abby Lotkis: No, I, I'm so glad. I mean, it really,
riverside_flams_- abby lotkis _ jan 08, 2026 001_finish_lines & mile: I've
Abby Lotkis: to people before, many people that the success in our first year that we've had among many factors. I think is indicative of two things indicative of one, of course, how loved Alyssa was, right? And how loved she is, but then also additionally indicative of how real this issue is and how much people want change surrounding this.
and I think those are the two things that just keep driving us forward, knowing that there are so many women out there who have experienced maybe not as severe or not as tragic as Alyssa's experience, but in some way something that was unsafe. And, to know that we can just continue to empower women, and equip them with [01:01:00] tools so that they can keep doing what they love.
I
Ally Brettnacher: mm-hmm.
Abby Lotkis: I myself am an example of that. I want to keep doing what I love. I love this, you know, and I, I want. I don't want anything to keep me from that. And I don't want it to keep it from my daughter either. You know, like I, I want her to be able to do anything she wants and loves to do.
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah. Yeah,
Abby Lotkis: yeah. So thank you for your support.
Ally Brettnacher: yeah. Absolutely. All right. I'm gonna ask you the end of the podcast questions now,
Abby Lotkis: Yes.
Ally Brettnacher: and maybe I'll put a little twist on it if you think you could also answer on behalf of Alyssa. So
So
for the first one in particular, so the first question that I ask everyone is, what's your favorite running mantra and or song?
So perhaps for you personally, Abby, but then if Alyssa had a favorite song or like something she always said can include that too.
Abby Lotkis: I think I say on behalf of all the Lokits women that we love our booty shaken songs when we run. so anything that's like early two [01:02:00] thousands club. Like music, shake the booty music that was, our jam. So that I can't give one specific song off the top of my head, but that's, that's the genre that we
Ally Brettnacher: hmm.
Abby Lotkis: love.
Ally Brettnacher: It's giving a glimpse into, I mean, it's not country obviously, but it's giving a glimpse into the Nashville weekend that
Abby Lotkis: yes,
riverside_flams_- abby lotkis _ jan 08, 2026 001_finish_lines & mile: that's
Ally Brettnacher: how much fun you had.
Abby Lotkis: Yes.
Ally Brettnacher: Mm-hmm.
mm-hmm.
Abby Lotkis: for mantra, running Mantra,
Ally Brettnacher: Mm-hmm.
Abby Lotkis: I don't know about a mantra as much as it's just I realize especially after running that marathon, untrained how much we are capable of,
Ally Brettnacher: Mm,
Abby Lotkis: as humans and physically, but then also, you know, mentally and emotionally we are capable of so much and we can do so much.
It really is. I mean, the sky's the limit, which is terrifying, but also really empowering sometimes to know that, you know, we can, we can do [01:03:00] this. And, we're strong. We are everybody, every, every human is,
Ally Brettnacher: Yes. Yeah, I was trying to think of Kipchoge. Iliad Kipchoge, his like phrase, he's like, no, human is limited. That's
what he says. Which I think is like, yeah. You're like, yeah, we just put so much limits on ourselves.
Abby Lotkis: Yes. Mm-hmm.
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah. Um, and then the next question is, next. Finish line and or milestone.
riverside_flams_- abby lotkis _ jan 08, 2026 001_finish_lines & mile: for
Abby Lotkis: For me, next
Ally Brettnacher: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
Abby Lotkis: Hmm.
Ally Brettnacher: I mean, you just celebrated 10 years of marriage. That's a big one.
Abby Lotkis: Uh, that was good. my next one. Hmm. I mean, there's a few, it depends on the, on the phase of life, I guess.
Ally Brettnacher: make it whatever you want.
Abby Lotkis: okay. You know, okay. Here's one that my husband and I wanna do for, wanted to do for our tenure, but then he tore his ACL. We both wanna get like para motor certified, paragliding certified. So that's my next, our next milestone as a couple is to get [01:04:00] paraglide certified, which, yeah, that would
Ally Brettnacher: How I don't even, yeah, how do you even do that? You go to classes and literally get a certification.
Abby Lotkis: Yeah.
Ally Brettnacher: Wow.
Abby Lotkis: So that would be probably, and then of course I wanna run another marathon, actual trained marathon, and beat my untrained time. Which bothers me that I'm like hurt and I still can't beat that time. So that's like another personal goal is like my own personal, wanting to actually train and do well in a full
Ally Brettnacher: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And so you mentioned being injured and you mentioned your foot because of the untrained. So is that what's still bothering you,
Abby Lotkis: Yeah. So, yeah, after I first I ran it, I thought I broke my foot, um, because I didn't, I was stupid and I didn't even stop to walk the whole, the whole thing. And so I, just, yeah, anyway, stupid and thought I broke it, healed it. Trained for half marathon, ran a half marathon, was great. But then it started kind of creeping back, this [01:05:00] summer and I was starting another training cycle for a half marathon to marathon.
Had to back outta the half, tried to get started back up again. And then it just kept persisting and I kept training. You know how, I don't know if you do that, but it's like, oh, it hurts. Well let's just keep running on it. It'll be
okay. Yes, exactly. It'll be fine. Like, you know, and it wasn't. And then next thing I knew I was in a boot and then it wasn't a stress fracture.
It's some sort of, I don't know what it is. It's some sort of nerve thing. But hopefully soon though, I'm hopeful that in the new year I'll be able to start another training cycle.
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah. And do your li do your kids run at all or do races?
Abby Lotkis: my middle one does love a good 5K. he does, my daughter and her kindergarten year ran the fastest and the farthest out of anybody in her class for the fun run. They're like school fun run,
Ally Brettnacher: Yep. We have that here. Mm-hmm.
Abby Lotkis: My oldest, he did cross [01:06:00] country for a year, but he was like, mom, this sucks. I don't like this.
So yeah. Yeah. They're big, they're big mountain bikers, like mountain bikers, snowboarders, so that's their, their jam. Yeah,
Ally Brettnacher: Yeah.
well, Abby, thank you so much for doing this.
It was, it was really great to get to know you better, and certainly talk about Alyssa and Free to move and how everybody can continue to support you and then Alyssa's legacy.
Abby Lotkis: Thank you so much for having me. Thank you.
Ally Brettnacher: Absolutely, and thank you to everybody who has listened and happy running.
If you enjoyed this episode of Finish Lines and Milestones from Sandy Boy Productions, please share rate review. I think it's also really important to share Alyssa's story like Abby said. And again, if you wanna support free to move, you can go to, we are free to move.org
And it felt kind of weird to include this in the beginning along with an ad, so I'll say it now, but this week I launched a new series of the Finish Lines and Milestones podcast called Catching Up with Coach. Where I am doing just that, catching up with my [01:07:00] coach Rachel Senders.
From Rachel. Michelle running. And so I'll talk more about my own personal running and training and plans for the year, and that'll be a monthly series. We're hoping to have that drop every first Wednesday of the month. So January's episode is now live, if you are interested in checking that out. And I hope it's enjoyable, entertaining, helpful.
Please gimme your feedback and thank you Rachel for supporting me and the podcast. I will see you next week.